It is understandable that any parents want nothing but the best for their child and if you are one, I believe you feel the same way too! The love you have for your kids knows no limits, but maybe it should especially in the case whereby you do not teach them to have any discipline and responsible behavior. There is a fine line between loving and spoiling, and if you don’t stop bad behavior from becoming part and parcel of their life, when they are still young, your spoiled little brat will eventually become a spoiled adult.
There are some simple but proven ways that can help you to avoid spoiling your child and, the same time, also help to nurture a responsible, respectable and well-rounded individual. If this is what you are looking out for… please continue to read on!
1 – Establish and enforce clear, strict limits
There should be no gray area here. Once you tell your child what you will and will not allow, you must hold your position firmly. The very moment that you decide to backtrack and allow your child to cross the line of what you have established as acceptable behavior, there is no going back and it will be tough to reverse the situation. Children naturally crave discipline, but they will test you from time to time. Therefore you need to set your limits and then enforce them strictly. Your relationship with your child will be all the better for this.
2 – Teach children to work for what they want
To prevent yourself from spoiling your child, why not teach them a valuable behavior they can benefit from for the rest of their life? Many child care experts believe that kids quickly become spoiled when they get what they want too easily. Set up a reward system (you can get a ready-made one like the Kenson Kids Reward Chart) attached to specific actions, and you will be equipping your child with a wonderful and responsible work ethic.
3 – Chores get done, followed by the fun
This seems like a no-brainer. Of course your children should tidy their rooms or finish their homework before playtime, right? Unfortunately, not all parents believe this. Being strict on chores and rewarding their completion with fun-time activities makes your child appreciate them even more. Pediatricians believe that being strict on responsibilities helps foster your child’s ability to cope with frustration. Likewise, you can always have the reward and responsibility chart to help you manage these areas. Even toddlers benefit from the self-esteem that helping out around the house delivers.
4 – Never reward begging behavior
Often times you can spot a spoiled child from a mile away. He is the one who consistently begs and begs and begs until he gets what he wants. The first time you reward begging behavior, you are starting your child down a very slippery slope toward more negative and irresponsible actions. Do you really want to teach your children that begging is a more effective way of getting what they want or you prefer them to work towards it and get the rewards?
5 – Be prepared to disappoint your child
Always remember that as you raise your children, you are setting life examples that they will take into adulthood. Establish and backup clear and definable limits, and teach your children responsibility by letting them work towards the things that they want.
Chores are never fun (even for adults), but you definitely know that they must be done before the real fun begins. And don’t forget that sometimes you will have to disappoint your child. This includes never rewarding begging behavior. These 5 simple tips will keep you from spoiling your children, and will set them on a healthy and responsible path that will pay wonderful social and personal dividends for the rest of their lives.